Disclaimer: A post with a LOT of photos to load. All music links lead to corresponding Youtube videos of said links.~~~~
If you Google image search the phrase "can't live without music", it yields the expected images of gaudy text on a background that were probably posted on a 15 year old's angsty blog. Another word for this phrase however, is the word Melomania.
A trope commonly seen in movies, tv shows, cartoons, and comics alike, the image of the aspiring, apathetic rockstar teen who plays in a garage band with their friends and wears purple hair and lip rings, is what generally comes to mind when one thinks of someone passionate about music. However, for many people melomania is a real and true condition, so to speak (and yes, that includes many of those stereotyped teens).
There is an image floating around about what the word Melomaniac means.
However, according the dictionary, it's a little more than that. Medical Dictionary defines it as a person with "(1) A singing compulsion; (2) An abnormal passion for music." Of course, this is far from any mental illness or medical condition, mind you (trust me, I would know). I wouldn't even classify it as an addiction. However, for me, being a Melomaniac is only magnified by my trait to hyperfocus and make odd connections via ADHD.
I don't personally know any other melomaniacs out there, other than myself (possibly my mother? but not to the degree of myself). Still, here is what it's like to be one....and if you have the realization that you are one yourself, then c'mon. Let's share some songs.
 |
| Revelator Eyes. A beautiful song/video about using music to speak your feelings. |
Back in high school, we read a story, and watched a film about a vain girl being seduced and stalked by a satyr or demon-like creature disguised as a human guy (I can't remember the title, but it's not really important). What stood out to me was when the teacher mentioned for us to take note that the main female character always had music playing. No matter where she went, there was a radio on, a record player, a jukebox. I can't remember the significance to the plot of the story, but I do remember how that moment stuck out to me. I had never really thought about it, but everywhere I went I had music playing. From childhood on, whether it was a walkman, a CD player, Hitclips, an mp3 player, the computer, the tv, the radio, or my cell phone, I constantly kept music around me. I've got 26 seperate playlists on Youtube for different types of music and each playlist has anywhere form 18 to 200+ songs. Not to mention, I subscribe to channels like MrSuicideSheep and Funky Panda where they post new music practically daily (okay that sounds like a sponsor plug.. but it's just the truth).
Honestly it doesn't sound too big of a deal, and on a surface level, it isn't. Many people keep music on daily to help them work, distract them, help them zone out, or refresh...but it's deeper than that for me. While I also enjoy having background music or something to mask the silence and keep my work/art flow going, I've always had a deep emotional tie to music.
We all have that song that we hear and it takes us back to that one moment. Perhaps a first date, first kiss, break up, a fun time with friends, family gatherings, a lonely time, etc. Imagine having that feeling about almost every song you listen to, for almost every feeling you have. Every situation is tied to a song, every song is tied to a feeling, every feeling needs explaining through poetry and a melody.
Usually, it just feels like I can't fully understand what I am feeling until I listen to a song pertaining to that feeling(whether by lyrics or sound of the music itself). I have to find the song that perfectly embodies it (or the situation).
And when I find that song? Sometimes it feels like...
While other times it's more like...
There is a certain invigorating certainty in finding a song that perfectly confirms, explains, and expresses my emotions/feelings for a situation, or a situation itself. I almost can't describe it. Sometimes I can't even explain or express anything that I am feeling, or how to feel toward something until I find a song to match. And, don't be fooled, I don't discriminate. It can be instrumental, rock, trance, dance, country, folk, whatever.
Beyond having a perfect song for a situation/feeling, I also have a need to find songs that perfectly match a specific aesthetic, theme, or mood. This is usually for locations and things that I see. I tend to associate certain places or types of places rather with genres of music or songs. For example, a photo like this:
Can only be matched by and with a song such as St. Clarity by The Paper Kites or I Live Alone by Sky Sailing. Meanwhile, an imagine such as this:
....feels like it absolutely has to be with a song like World On Fire by Above and Beyond or something like Too Cool by Euge Groove (ignore the goose lol).
Rest assured, I don't just do this for fun with photos and gifs online. When I'm really in scenes/places such as this, I have this burning urge to listen to that music which matches with the aesthetic of what I'm seeing. While I gravely enjoy and find joy in matching songs to random things that just feel right, it's much like a natural, ingrained need that I have to fulfill, otherwise I'm not taking in the entirety of the world around me. Ironic, considering many people use music as a way to separate from reality... but I need it in order connect with it. Perhaps this is an off-product of the ADHD, or an OCD (these things are often co-morbid and overlap). Perhaps, some weird version of synesthesia. Whatever the cause is, it's made me a true melomaniac and I don't see it ending any time soon.
While there is a minor annoyance in having to pause while taking a walk or going somewhere, just to pick out the perfect song for that moment or situation, and car rides with no music are a mild form a torture for me, I try to put my melomania to good use and have produced a lot of art through it. In fact, of the 98 drawings of the first page of the featured folder of my Deviantart gallery, 34 of those artworks are actually illustrations of songs or characters drawn to a specific song. Add another 10-20 more, if you count the ones titled after songs (but not necessarily created FOR a specific song). In any case, music is an extremely important factor in my work and without the ability to hear the same song over and over and over while I draw a picture, I wouldn't be able to make much of anything.
In honestly, I am truly grateful the Lord saw fit to give me this music-related gift. I see it as such and nothing less. I appreciate it and I cradle my connection to music close to my heart. Some people may see it as a problem, a crutch, or addiction, but it's nothing like that. It's not a crutch for my feelings, it is the way I understand my feelings. It's like using a translator to understand a foreign language.
In contrast with the prior mentioned and posted image defining what a melomaniac is, I discovered this, much more accurate one.
That's the only way it can be explained. I don't ever want to change, and I don't want to be ashamed of it. I love music. It's a part of me.It's how the Lord made me to see and understand the world.
I spend many a night scoping indie electronic song posts on youtube, or stopping for a minute to scroll through my music library to find that perfect song to walk to class to for the day...and I wouldn't change that tune for anything.
